REALLYNICE

(if you are struggling in this moment and it is helpful for you to read things that could help you know you are not alone, read thru, if you are struggling and in need of some fantasy, escapism go to the bottom)

Thru a thick and morphing cloud of nausea, devastation, disappointment, confusion and rage emerges a moment of clarity. thru the seemingly endless series of miniature wars happening from the Middle East to my own bloodstream, amongst family and on the screen comes a moment where you look out the window and its a sunny day and some kid rides a bike by in blissful oblivion, just like I did not that long ago (relatively).

It’s all gonna be OK.

While walking down the street today in Philly, a perfect November summer day I realized what I am in my world view. An angry optimist.

I refuse to subscribe to the concept that everyone that disagrees with me on this is a terrible person. This is an example that feels most true to that but I refuse. Misinformed? Maybe? Not seeing the whole picture? Maybe.

I refuse to accept that love, kindness, and the ultimate acceptance that we are all one is unattainable. I recognize the pendulum nature of things. I recognize it is all apart of the process.

What kills me most in all of this is thinking about the people in which this election was a quest for safety, feeling seen, respect and validation. Regardless if Kamala Harris was perfect as a leader – it was more about the people that would feel safe, inspired and even empowered by her assuming the role of the president. And in turn, knowing very well the kind of people and mindsets that Donald Trump validates and empowers. That is the biggest struggle in all of this.

At the end of the day and that aside, all I can hope is that it’s not as bad as it seems. That all of us we will be able to continue on living, breathing, creating, loving and existing without disruption. That he is either too incompetent to carry out some of the insane and detrimental plans or that maybe there is a total mind change or that it was all bullshit just to get the extra votes of….dare I say: terrible people.

It’s hard, man. It’s hard to be sensitive, it takes great strength. It’s hard to go beyond ones self and it only gets harder each day it seems. But I think it is ultimately always worth it. If nothing else, we know at least half of people are in the same boat and that’s not nothing.

NOW FOR A BRIEF MOMENT OF FANTASY FICTION BECAUSE IT FEELS NICE SOMETIMES:

• Something is up. Somethings not adding up. That was a very quick and smooth process, that was a very rapid concession and a speech that kind of felt like this wasn’t over. Let’s fantasize about some miracle happening that exposes something crazy that flips the whole thing upside down. Let’s fantasize a moment about how much more satisfying the fall would be after reaching the heights.

• THE “TRUMP IS ACTUALLY ANDY KAUFMAN” THEORY. – this is one of my all time favorite theories. If this could be true in any universe I would probably become permanently speechless, explode into 1.5 billion pieces, become physically one with god and the stars. It is one of my favorite things to fantasize about and it is the only thing that would make it all make sense. If you don’t know, Andy Kaufman was a “comedian” and performance artist who was active in the late 70’s and early 80’s. He died in 1986 at the age of 35 from lung cancer. but there is a conspiracy theory that he faked his death and is still out there somewhere. If anyone could pull this off it would be him. Go look him up. Enjoy.